Because you assumed that my family must be in the mafia because we're Italian (so what if that's a little true.)
Because I'm tired of people saying "Bada-bing" and "fuggitdaboutit" and my name with a Brooklyn accent thinking that it's hilarious. It's not, so shut up.
Because my genetics give my upper lip a bit of a shadow and a nose that's nowhere near a button and I like it that way.
Because I'm loud and I talk with my hands but that's just called a spirited conversation in my family. It's not my fault you're boring.
Because my grandparents spoke English and Italian and weren't any less American for it.
Tag, you're it.
It’s us, but in dead animal form. But not really dead because they weren’t ever alive. Undead? No. That makes them sound like vampires. So not that. Fuck. I don’t know the word. Hey, how long can a title be? Because this seems excessive. Someone should stop me. Jesus. This is as bad as 280-character twitter.