Wednesday, January 27, 2010

Sleep Issues: When it Rains, it Pours

The surest way to ensure your baby stops sleeping through the night? Brag about it on your blog.

Oscar woke last night at around 1:30AM, after Oscar woke in his big boy bed crying for his Dad. Miles then proceeded to cry intermittently for the next two hours. I think I've said before that Miles sleep in a room adjoining ours and while we do close the door between the rooms, the crying is still awful loud. Even though it was only intermittent, I decided to leave our room at around 3:30 so I could get some rest before getting up at 5:30. I slept in Oscar's empty big boy bed.

At that point, Miles really ramped it up an cried hard for 30 minutes before falling asleep. He woke again at 5:15 and I took him to the big bed where he promptly crashed out on my chest. I then overslept by almost an hour and had no time to shower this morning.

Oscar? Not loving the big boy bed. I went out to dinner with friends last night leaving my mom and Nelson to put the boys down. Apparently, Miles went down like a dream, but Oscar fought tooth and nail until Nelson relented and put Oscar down in our bed. He moved Oscar back at around 11:30, but Oscar was up again at 1:30 wanting to come back to the big bed.

So, what's the deal with the crying, folks? We have been faithfully crying-it-out for several weeks. Now, Miles had is never ending ear infection that stalled things for a bit, but since he got his second round of antibiotics nearly two weeks ago, it's been game on again. Two weeks of CIO and maybe four nights of sleeping through and he back to crying? I mean, come on. I'm getting close to breaking here.

And, Oscar. I'm willing to allow that this is a transitional time for him. Switching beds is a big deal. Now I'm thinking that maybe we should not have gone full-blown big boy bed and should have first gone with a toddler bed. Oscar's crib will convert, but we'd been hoping that in a week or two we could move Miles into Oscar's room and crib. Obviously, this plan is not going to work if we can't get Oscar to sleep in the big bed. There's not room for the big bed, the toddler bed, and a crib in Oscar's room.

I'm throwing myself at your mercy, dear friends. All of your more experienced parents, what should we do? Should we try the toddler bed and wait to move Miles into Oscar's room? Should we just go ahead and move Miles in and hope that makes Oscar and Miles both feel more secure? And what about Miles? Any suggests on what to do with Miles when CIO isn't working?

Oh and Miles hasn't nursed since around 2PM yesterday (he's missed two feedings) and is showing no signs of wanting to nurse. I tried to nurse him after breakfast and no deal. I'm feeling a little heartbroken by this.


Diana said...

Ah, Pompi! I'm feeling for you, lady! I don't have any advice since I only have one and she isn't a good sleeper. But I'm holding you and your non-sleepers-don't-want-to-change-bed children in my heart and hoping that everything works out. Soon.

Sprite's Keeper said...

Sprite didn't really have a bad time adjusting to the toddler bed, but she spent the first few nights on her Sesame Street pull out couch since it was lower to the ground. That seemed to help. Maybe Oscar helping to decorate the bed will get him more invested in it? As for the nursing, I understand. That's all I can say. ((hugs))

VandyJ said...

I have no suggestions just lots of sympathy. Bruiser is sleeping ok for now but I'm always on edge that it won't last. We transitioned Turbo to the big boy bed at about 2. His room was far from ours and he couldn't turn the knob and a couple of times he fell asleep on the floor of his room cause he left his bed. But he was a great sleeper. Not much hepl I know but I'm thinking about you and hoping that things get better.

Anonymous said...

You poor thing. I know how hard it is to have two so close in age so I really do feel for you. I was a co sleeping parent though. If they wanted in we/I let them in. Eventually they got over being in bed with me/us and started sleeping in their own beds. To this day if they want to hop in I let them and the only one who ever wants to is Brody. I love it when they climb in and snuggle with me/us the rare times that they do. Sterling did it for less than a year, Lena would sleep anywhere but her bed until she was three, Brody was in bed with us until he was 8 months old then came back to me around age four, off and on. After over twelve years and very few sleepless nights I am a happy mom :) I wish you luck, I really do :)

Bugaloo said...

Oh, it's so hard. My daughter Alice was 2 when her brother Andy was born, at which point we skipped right up to a twin. Here is how we muddled through:
-We got her involved with picking out her bedroom bed stuff, she got a special stuffed animal - we also were moving so she got to pick out the color we painted too.
-Then we got everyone on board telling her how great it was to be in the bed; she got some special "reading books" and a little book light.
-We also did a "ticket" system -- each night she to 3 tickets -- "kiss" "hug" and "snuggle". She could get out of bed 3 times to redeem her tickets. Sometimes it worked like a dream, other times not to so much!
-Yet still, it was an adjustment. There were many nights we had the "bedroom shuffle" where we all ended up in different beds/couches than where we started.
Keep trying things out and listening to your instincts. You are a great mom, trust that.
-Amy (Monica's friend from St. Paul) (one of them) (she's very popular as you might guess)

Becky said...

Okay Jenni, lots here. Now Miles: is he going to sleep on his own at bedtime, with crying? With no crying? Or is he only waking and crying in the night? He seems like the issue that's bugging you more, so I'm trying to separate his issues out.

What if you told Oscar, "you have to go to bed in your big boy bed, but if you wake up and see daylight outside, you can come and get in mom and dad's bed"? I seem to remember doing that with Laura (granted, she was three I think), and it's like it gave her a plan.

Casey said...

Dude, we're in the same boat here. We're on week five of doing Supernanny with the toddler bed but it's not working. And we haven't slept since we moved G 3 months ago. It sucks my balls.

Jamie said...

Oh, Jenni honey. I am so sorry.

You don't mention how/where they sleep for naps. Do they take naps? I am a big proponent of sleep begets sleep. The Man Cub is a sleeper so it works for us to have him nap and then he sleeps much better at night.

I am terrified to move him to a big bed but that will need to happen sometime soon.

Oh, and the nursing - no fun when they decide they are done before you do.

rachel said...

I admit that Ben hasn't slept in his bed for months :( I feel guilty, but I don't really know Our family type is different from yours, it's easier to be unconventional when it won't disrupt anyone else. Plus, that'd be a crazy full bed at your house! Good luck :)

Mrsbear said...

Could it be the ear infection is still bugging him? When Max had his bouts with the ear infections, the antibiotics worked but only temporarily. Kept having to switch, then it would come back stronger. Made him crazy. Made me crazy. That might explain him not feeding too.

As far as the toddler bed, Max is still in a crib. But him and his brother have been sharing a room since he was 9 months. I think it does help somewhat that neither of them feels too alone.

Good luck. Hope you got some zzzzzz.

Barbara said...

Yikes, what a nightmare. My only suggestions would be to try them in the same room or to try Oscar in a Ready Bed. Do you have them? Essentially they are a blow up bed with bedding attached. Sort of a sleeping bag with an inflatable underneath. Does that make any sense? Either the security of another body in the room, or being a bit nearer the floor might help.

Good luck.

Frogs in my formula said...

We have been dealing with never ending ear infections too and lots of crying at night even though Junior's been on antibiotics. The doctor said fluid between the ears can cause pain at night (when they're lying down), even if the fluid isn't infected. So maybe Miles is crying because his ears still bother him?

I'm no help with the toddler bed. We're trying that this weekend. Dun dun dun...

Captain Dumbass said...

Suggestions? No. Just tears of my own knowing that I'll be going through this again soon. Sweet sweet sleep, how I'll miss you.

Keely said...

I'm not more experienced so I got no advice - just unending sympathy. *hugs*

Big Mama Cass said...

Ugh :( Why do kids always throw us those curve balls??

The Mommy said...

Eeek! I have assvice because I totally suck. I feel you on the nursing front. Part of me feels like I might be ready to wean, but I am afraid that when the time comes it will kick my ass. *sigh*