Monday, January 17, 2011

Facebook status updates and replies that annoy me, even though I am guilty of making said updates and replies

1. "If there was a love button, I would push it!"

2. "Where's the dislike button?"

3: "Liking" ones own status update

4. An emoticon of any kind as a response/update

5. "Dislike!" (I type this one all the time and hate myself for it.)

6. Overuse of exclamation points

7. Overuse (read: any use) of ellipses

8. "I'll be right over!" in response to a food related status update

9. Replies that use asterisks to indicate and action, i.e. *shudders* or *slow claps* or *sniffles*

10. Weather related status updates

11. Consistently whiny status updates

12. Overly sarcastic updates

11. Updates written as an open letter to an inanimate object

12. Updates that are not sarcastic enough

13. Replies to status updates that compete for worst day, i.e. "Your kid may have a cold but mine is vomiting, FML!"

14. "FML!"

15. Updates that make your life seem more glamorous than mine

16. Any update that claims 98% of people won't repost the update (that statistic has no basis in reality!  NONE!)

17. Ill-informed political status updates/replies

So, are you as guilty of these infractions as I am?  What status updates/replies make you cringe?


Strawberry said...

Some of those don't bother me that much. But my list would include any religious/god references. And sports updates while they're still watching the game.

Krista said...

Guilty as charged for 5, 6, and 10. Agree with you on 11, 13, and 14.
Also can't stand any of the "It's son/daughter/sister/cousin/baby-daddy/mistress week!" Can it really be Great-Great-Grandma Week twice in one month?
I also hate any other "chain" updates, or silly bra color/where you keep your purse games. And the gazillion sports updates.

Sprite's Keeper said...

I know for a fact that I am guilty of this sometimes on your updates, but I would never write FML. Just found out what it means and I'm horrified.

Aliceson said...

Um yeah, guilty of almost all of these.

My husband's cousin is constantly whining/complaining on FB (#11) and it drives me nuts. I should just dump her, but occasionally it's fun to read since her posts always contain at least 2 spelling errors. At first when she would post these "the sky is falling" type updates, people would reply asking if everything was alright, now no one replies. I guess I'm not the only one annoyed by her whining.

Captain Dumbass said...

People actually "like" their own updates? Seriously?

Pamela said...

where's *your* love button???
that's not what i meant.

VandyJ said...

The chain ones bother me and I really don't like the overly religious ones. Then again, I tend to keep my posts fairly generic.

Anonymous said...

I was going to tell you which of these I'm guilty of (hint: too many), but I'm too busy cracking up over Pamela's comment.



rach said...

This website is perfect for you. I have been following it since it was a lowly little blog and it is super entertaining. I love hating on stupidity.

Sassy Sassy said...

Lol. I am guilty of almost ALL of those!!! I've recently started saying "That's what she said" as a comment on posts. I'm sure THAT annoys all my friends too.

Michele said...

I probably do about half of the these things but since I don't know what more than half are I can't be sure. What the hell is FML?

Keely said...

All of those, yes. Also the male-bonding/berating crap that goes on DURING the game. Shut. UP. I don't need to se 26 comments about what you think of each other's mothers.

Becky said...


Kidding! That is a great list. I just try to remember the rule I heard somewhere: Hunger or fatigue are not status updates. Everyone eats and gets tired. We can assume this is going on without posting it on fb. That's what my blog is for!

Just Another Lesbian said...

LOL - my general philosophy is that it's MY FB, so I'll post what I want, when I want. Since being friends with someone is a choice, anyone can choose to unfriend me. I'm certainly guilty of all of these...also a big perpetrator of inflammatory posts just to piss off Kelly's religious, conservative family who insist on being my friend.

In the end, I tend to think of FB as less than a real snapshot into my life and more of the entertainment or extreme moments.

:-) Mikki

gretchen said...

I am guilty of overuse of any and all punctuation marks. I am a particular fan of the ellipses, and refuse to give it up...
I totally agree with you on 1., 8.!, 9 & 15. Especially 15. All the moms from Jude's school are always posting about their fabulous vacations with their perfect, loving families. Grrr.