Monday, April 18, 2011

Conversations with a preschooler: Breakfast

Jenni: Okay, guys, what do you want for breakfast?

Oscar: ...

Miles: ...

Jenni: Alright, do you want cereal or eggs?

Oscar: I want cereal!

Miles: I wan cereal milk!

Jenni: What kind of cereal? Miles, do you want Cheerios or Rice Crispies?

Miles: I wan Cheeros milk!

Oscar: I want Rice Crispies without milk!

Jenni: Miles wants Cheerios with milk and Oscar wants Rice Crispies without milk.  How about blackberries?

Miles: I wan black buoys!

Oscar: I don't want blackberries!  I don't like them!

Jenni: So, we have one order for Cheerios with milk and blackberries and one order for Rice Crispies without milk, right?

Miles: Yeah!

Oscar: Yes.  NO! NO! I want Rice Crispies WITH milk!  I want them with milk, Mom!

Jenni: You want Rice Crispies with milk? Milk in the bowl with the Rice Crispies?

Oscar: Yes!

Jenni: You're sure?

Oscar: Yes, Rice Crispies with milk in a bowl.

Jenni: Okay, got it.

Jenni goes into to kitchen; Miles follows, Oscar remains in living room.  Jenni prepares two bowls of cereal.  One is Cheerios with milk and blackberries and one is Rice Crispies with milk.  She goes into dining room with spoons and cereal.

Jenni: Okay, guys, breakfast?

Jenni seats Miles in booster and Oscar wanders into dining room.


Jenni:  What?  What are you talking about?  We had a five minute discussion about what you wanted and you very clearly said Rice Crispies WITH milk!

Oscar [red faced, tears streaming, sobbing]: NO!  NOOOOOOOOO!  I WANT MINI WHEATS WITHOUT MILK!

Jenni: Are you kidding me?  You never even mentioned mini wheats!

Oscar: YES I DID! I HATE RICE CRISPIES! I DON'T WANT THEM! [slides bowl of Rice Crispies across table]

Jenni: Fine, Oscar.  I will get you some mini wheats.


Jenni: Yeah, I get it.  Mini wheats without milk.

Jenni goes into kitchen, prepares bowl of mini wheats without milk, and returns it to Oscar at the dining table.

Oscar: Thanks.

Jenni: You're welcome.

Jenni returns to kitchen, puts away cereal boxes, recycles empty box of Cheerios, rinses empty milk carton for recycling, wipes counters.  Returns to dining room to check on the progress of breakfast.

Oscar is eating his Rice Crispies with milk.  The bowl is almost empty.  The mini wheats are untouched.

Jenni: So, how are those Rice Crispies with milk? The ones you hate?

Oscar: Good. I don't hate them.  They are my favorite.

Jenni: And the mini wheats?

Oscar: I'm going to eat those later.

Jenni: Of course you are.

Oscar: Can I have more Rice Crispies with milk, please?

Jenni: You got it.


Jennifer said...

This made me laugh soooo much!! I have the same conversation with my 2 1/2 year old pretty much every morning at breakfast!! Today, instead of giving him any options, I just put the multi-grain cheerios in a bowl and put them in front of him-Success! He ate without having a fit-I'm sure it was a one time thing though!!

Captain Dumbass said...

I just started twitching involuntarily. Maybe just put all the cereal on the table plus one bowl of milk and one empty bowl in front of each and let them go at it. Messy, but they'll get what they want.

Stimey said...

Small children are psychopaths.

Heidi said...

I'm with Stimey.

Frogs in my formula said...

It's enough to make you nuts, isn't it?

Michele R said...

We get pretty excited over here about Mini Wheats too.
He must have been extra hungry!

gretchen said...

Ha! But don't you secretly love knowing what they're going to do before they do it even though you hate it when they do it/

Keely said...

Stimey wins the internet. I have variations of this conversation throughout the day, every day.

Strawberry said...

Seriously Jenni, just shoot me now.

A New Beginning said...

You are sooo much nicer than me. I would have told mine to eat it, because that is what they asked for :-)